how significant life is.
2006-12-29 @ 1:27 p.m.

wow it's been a long time.

I do believe it's been about four years since I first got this 'diary' thing.

so much has happened in those four years. way too much to even begin to describe. an online journal could never really present the whole picture of one's life. Though it often contains deep feelings and dark secrets, it can only represent such things at that one point in someone's life.

that's so confusing, but it makes sense to me.

some things have stayed the same. Deleshia is still my best friend. I still love Justin, and we'll always be a little more than friends. I still care about my education and my future more than anything.

more things, though, have changed. I've grown up, as has everyone else. It's weird to see the same people I knew 10 years ago today.. to see how they've grown and matured.

college is a whole new entity of life. I enjoy it...even the classes. I enjoy the routine with the occassional break from it.

My brothers are almost in high school. They mean more to me than almost anything. I love them.. and I want them to do good things. I want them to have fun without making incredibly stupid mistakes. I like to think I guide them and I have a little bit of an influence on their decisions. I hope they look up to me (though they definitely dont physically. they're both a good head taller than I am already).

ah. I wonder if I'll look back on this a month from now..six months from now.. a year from now.. and wonder how stupid it sounds.

most likely.

but that's what growing is about.

and like I said, just because I'm thinking like this today.. and just because I chose this time to write down my thoughts, does not mean this is how I think everyday.

I find myself l